Ego-Propelled into the Day

pride 2I cannot share some of the ego-in-control discoveries on my spiritual path because they are deeply personal and very difficult to reveal. Layer after layer exposed with me asking, “Is this truly a part of me? Is this who I am?” My ego, the false me, takes pride in everything. ‘I’m a spiritual person;’ ‘I’m a good mother;’ ‘I’m a writer, getting better every day,’ and on and on and on.

These thoughts are not always front and center; I get a flicker of a feeling here or there and I dig—and there they are, thumbing their noses at me, not a bit unhappy about being exposed, because my ego believes it will always be with me, even driving me at times. At times? Only God sees how much our egos propel us into each day, their feathers fluffed, ever ready to publicly humiliate us if need be. The private humiliation is worse when doors to past lives open and past behaviors are seen.

We can’t really battle our egos or past behaviors; they will always come out on top. The spiritual process truly is about what the great spiritual masters teach: “Observe and let go. Observe and let it pass. Give it no energy. Smile. Get quiet to be  at one with the Light. Persevere; operating from ego is an unnatural state. You are a child of a Great Being of Love.”

Okay, great masters. I’m trusting you on this. Thank you.

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3 thoughts on “Ego-Propelled into the Day

  1. Hi Pam…I find I have been doing a lot of this over the last year of two as well. I remember a situation and then find myself ashamed about how I dealt with it; wishing I could un-do it. I have been finding however that as I forgive myself for my transgressions, I am becoming more compassionate towards others for theirs. I am still struggling with current day ego issues too; trying to disentangle the times when something is a legitimate problem that needs to be addressed (i.e. someone not listening to me means that an important problem goes uncorrected) and when something is just my ego feeling miffed (i.e. I feel unseen but there are no external repercussions). Kim

    • Hi Kim, That’s a really enlightening way to look at the ego issue: Will something go uncorrected, or am I just feeling miffed? Thank you! That will truly help me with my own outlook. And in my life, also, the biggest grower of compassion in me has been seeing that all the things that upset me to one degree or another are inside me, too. How this one insight could change the world if we all saw ourselves in each other. Thank you for sharing your wisdom here. It means a lot to me. Pam

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